Finally I get some rest! I haven't been touching the computer for a week! That's quite long i guess? English paper 1 was quite okay? But not paper 2! The stupid school wanted to kill us! Idiot one! My brain was literally jammed after that! And I rushed my summary like siao! I wonder if I can still get my A1! I just wanted to go home and you stone there until the effect subsides. A 15 min nap did it for me, before I left for the library.

E Maths on monday was quite okay? But I doubt I can get my A1 anymore. I found paper 1 hard and I screwed up my paper 2 with like 3 or 4 major mistakes?! Oh and I screwed up my Social Studies essay to! One of it. I was going to do Venice and I forgot the points for the first essay! It was like after I completed everything else that I recalled it! By then, there was very little time left. Chemistry I must say for the first time in my life, I'm confident of passing! HAHAHA! I've never pass once since upper sec! I realised Chemistry isn't that hard you know! I shall start mastering it for Os!

Then came a break cos Art was on wednesday. I had a really good nap! So I became a bloody mugger yesterday! I studied geog the whole day and I still couldn't finish it! So I didn't managed to finish the paper today! I wonder how retarded people like leslie and Jit Yong can write 16 pages when I only wrote like 9 pages? Must train my speed already! Nevermind, there's still paper 1 for me to makeup. Physics, A Maths, Chinese and Elect Lit is the week when holidays open! Means I have to study during the holidays and make damn sure I get As for those, well expect of course Chinese! HAHAHA! I can NEVER get it!

So I have an early holiday which starts today! Or tomorrow I should say? I want to do many things! I want to go out, and play! and Shop! and have fun! But still study! I hope I have a chance to make one of those days one that I will remember! After such a long time! I have like 100 plus in my wallet and 100 plus in my bank and I have absolutely no idea what to do with it! Even though I have many things that I want to buy, see how, I'm still deciding.

Oh, the more I see Frankie, the prettier she gets! HAHAHA!

Got to go now!
BYEEEEEEEEEE!

As long as you're dreaming, we're not giving in.

[Song: Dreaming - Frankie and Calvin]

I'm addicted to this songgggggg! It's nice! I keep singing it to myself in class! HAHAHA!

OHHHHH! Tomorrow is the start of my prelimssss! It's english and I want to get my A1! Well, hope I get it! STUDY STUDY STUDY! YOU CAN DO IT TOO! Okay I have to go now! Night studies!

BYE BYE BYE BYE BYE BYE!

This week is going to be really busy man! Like some super studying week. I had my first Chinese lesson yesterday for those retaking and I must say it's really good man. You know why? Cos there is no more Aaron Goh!!!! HAHAHHA! He seriously can't teach for nuts. Now there's these 2 super good chinese teachers teaching just the 6 of us. Good right?! Doesn't mean there's only 6 retaking chinese ah! There are still others with other teachers. But these 2 teachers, their form classes had the most number of A1s i think? My friend was like "Wah, the first chinese lesson after 2 years!" HAHAHA! Damn mean! Oh oh, both the 7pm and 9pm chinese drama are gone! BOOOO! Nothing to watch now. Which is also a good thing la. Lucikly the 7pm one will return! Yay! Come on Cheenaaaaa!

I really need to catch up on my Geog and Chem man! I want to pon school tomorrow and head to the library to studyyyyy! School tomorrow is super waste of time! Unproductive shit! That's why I want to ponnn! I hope my mom allows. I told my Dad this morning. I shall go and pester her when she comes home tonight. Plus I've been super tired these 2 days! I keep falling asleep in class! I need to catch up on my sleep! So if i'm allowed to pon, means I can sleep a little more! I want to study on friday too! After my English paper! Wish my luck man! I need to go and revise the format for situational writing. I hope there will be night studies even when exams are on! Speaking of which I didn't go yesterday and today! And If I pon school tomorrow, I doubt I will be going as well. So thursday is the last day for me this week. So sad, it's fun you know and porductive too!

I'm going to study my ass off now! HAHAHA!

TATA!

[Song: Don't Drop That Dime - Velvet Revolver]

This song never fails to cheer me up! HAHAHHA! It's super funny! Image a hard rock group playing country music! OMG! HAHAHA! I came to realised that if you keep yourself in that feeling forever, you will be less likely to ever come out of it. So you have to do something about it and end all your misery! Maybe there's some bright side after all? Okay I think I'm quite high now, after all that singing and jumping around!

Got to go for night studies real soon and after that we are going to have a bit of fun amid all our busy lives. We are going out to eat after that, dinner for me and maybe supper for others? HAHA! I don't knowwwww. It's going to be the first meal of the day too! I'm not aneroxic ah! Don't send me to the SGH rehab thing hor! I'm just saving money! Hahahha!

Well, I'm really sorry.
Looks like I've done it again.
It's not your fault, it's mine.
I'll try my best, and we'll be closer than ever.

[Song: HADES - Dir en grey]

Flaws. I've realised that I've plenty of that. I have a damn fucked up attitude that always hurt the people I love most, so maybe it's best to stay away from me? Not that I want to, but I always end up doing it somehow. I lie, so never believe a thing I say. Everything I do always come backs to me, so I have to change. I tried, it's not as if I never try. I keep telling myself that, but sometimes it just gets the better of me. Everything is my fault, what goes around comes around. Why is it that people all around me seem to be in a better position than I am? Sigh.

Yes, I was lonely, I was sad, but I wasn't angry. What if one day someone asks you out and you both agreed but that person doesn't turn up? How would you feel? All I ever wanted to do was to spend time with the one I love most, but it was not to be. Oh and I realised that patience in me is really just another self-denial thing that people say I have. It's all bullshit. I've none of it. I've learnt it the hard way and I still need to improve on it.

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ, now I know my ABC, won't you come and sing with me? HAHAHHA! Okay I'm bored.

BYE BYE BYE!

[Song: Brand New Beat - BoA]

I've been seriously lost and confused these few days. After getting back my Chinese results. I've been thinking whether I should retake it. What if i get the same results? Will it affect my time spend on other subjects and whether they will be affected? Sigh, I really don't know. All I know is that I signed up for it and I'm going to retake it. I really really hope I do well this time.

Well, I had my English Orals yesterday and I seriously don't know how well I did. I'm really really scared. Reading was perfect, picture was quite erm......bad should I say? I don't know whether it's bad but I felt it was the worst among the 3 components cos the picture was just this bus stuck in a flooded road and people pushing it. That's all, nothing else. Many of us felt that there were quite little things to talk about. Conversation was pretty average i guess? The first question was "How do you find Singapore's weather?". Not that hard, but the weather's been quite erratic lately so it's quite weird. Oh and there was this question "Have you ever been in a life threatening situation?" but still considering the weather. I said no, then they moved on. I mean what's there to say? YES! YES! I've been and talk some crap up? But that's the part that I'm quite scared about, whether it will pull my marks down?

Even now I still feel very lost. Like my life is some sort of maze that I have to find my way out. My mood has been quite erratic too. Maybe it's just the stress and all? Hopefully I guess. Sometimes it just makes me wonder what I should do? The plan that I always wanted to do now seems to have disappeared before me. I don't know even know if I will ever do it again? Well, I did want to but it just seems all too weird now, after what had happened. Whether it is or it's not? I guess I'm quite a failure in everything I do. Sigh.

This song always cheers me up.

So I've gotten back my chinese O level results are I must say I'm really disappointed in what I've gotten. I got like a freaking C5? How's that man! I bet even my younger cousin did better than me la! Sure one! Confirm! I really felt like crying in class. And what sort of pissed me off too was that those bloody idiots who play and disrupt Chinese class everyday got B3! How unfair is that! Well, life's like that! We just got to live with it and just let it go. Maybe it's what God has given to us as well, so we should be thankful for that. I really don't know if I should retake? The thought of having to go through all that shit again is OMG! Hell no man! I mean even if I get a better grade for Chinese which is B3 at max! I doubt I will use it to be counted into my L1R5. It just looks better on the certificate, so like what's the point? Why waste time on a language when you could be spending that time on your other subjects? I really hope this would spur me on to work harder in my other subjects. Remember if I can do it so can you! Hahaha!

By the way, did I mention that we celebrated Mrs Woo's 63th Birthday today?! HAHAHA! It was really nice of us to do that. Okay what am I saying, she should be the one saying that! But yeah she DID say that! HAHAHA! The class was blowing the balloons during chemistry which I thought was really quite an inappropriate time cos the class wasn't really paying attention. All they care was about their blow jobs! Hahaha! We got her some pig soft toy as her present tied to a balloon. Anyway we bought her this really huge $66, 2kg mango cake which was custom order just for her! And you know being such a greedy pig I had my second serving even though it was a really small piece.

I didn't go for night studies today, partly cos I'm not in the mood for it since my chinese results are a let down and my friend isn't going tonight. Yes yes I'm a bad boy. But I promise I will go tomorrow! I shall not procrastinate anymore! I need to catch up on my studies! Prelims are very very important as you have to use it for you PAE. So yeah, must do well! Let's go!

I'm damn hungry! I shall go and find food nowwwwww!

Okay, I think I'm still suffering from the effects of Sakae Sushi that day! HAHAHA! I mean I've been feeling very bloated the past few days! Like even when I'm hungry, but my stomach is like bloated? Like there air inside man. Speaking of which, I have no lunch now. My family has abandoned me to watch Rush Hour 3! I want to watch it la! All because I have tuition later! But i think even if i didn't have tuition, I doubt I will still go. I need to study man! So now I'm home alone! Boring man!

I think from tomorrow onwards I shall go for night studies. I really need to catch up on my work, especially my geog and chem! If i go, thn means i can't get to watch all my chinese drama! So it's YOUR job to tell me what happens! HAHAHA! Anyway, the 7pm one is going to end soon. BOO! I want to know what happens!

Running and soccer later, you will see me break my legs! HAHAHA! I mean my street soccer shoes are really useless now. There's no more grip on it. Everytime I run damn fast and change direction I will SURELY slip and fall! Sigh! I need a new pair man! I want that freaking nice adidas one! I shall get money from my mom. Heehee.

I shall be a good boy and study now!

[Song: You're so pretty-We're so pretty - The Charlatans UK]

I've been really slack this week man! I have to really get down on my studies and prelims are just 15 days away! I even went out yesterday, oh but who cares, it was time well spent! Had Sakae Sushi buffet and I was so freaking full after that man! You know I came home to weight myself and I gained freaking 2kgs! Don't know who's smart idea it was huh! But I'm back to normal now. Hahaha. And and and I think that's the most expensive meal I ever spent on and ever eaten! It was like near $45 bucks for just myself? Around there la, plus the stupidest thing I did was to order so many red plates and it sort of defeated the purpose of buffet! Hahaha! That's why my mom always say I need to find a job that can suit my expensive taste next time! Nevermind, time to start saving again!

Oh the Sony PSP slim version is not out yet, but I want it! It's like slimmer and the ram speed is faster! Plus I don't like my black one! I WANT A WHITE ONE! Should have waited a bit longer last time! I need to buy need games too! My PSP is seriously under utilise, my memory stick space storage is also super small! Need to get a new one! But it all voice down to money man! Tsk! Means that will be quite some time from now man! I think maybe after Os? Hahaha.

I think I should shut up now. Tuition later and today is really study day!

Toodles!

Dear God, please help me to freaking open my damn mouth! ARGH!

A heart to heart talk is always good you know. It's makes you realise the things you never knew and never noticed much about yourself. So it's time to change, for the better, for the people around me and for myself. At least that's what I will try my very best to work on now. I'll do anything for you.

School today was a total waste of time man! I didn't bring anything to school and I felt really empty! Like as if something is missing! Had mass and Yvan was acting really retarded the whole time! I fell asleep during the homily! Guess I was super tired!? The celebration after that was way worse! Argh! Let's not talk about it!

My friends came over for soccer today! What can I say? It was really fun and retarded! Isaac and I were cracking jokes and acting retarded the whole time! Even so, we could still provide the goals man! It was really really hot! Like burning man! Idiots wanted to play so early! We could all have melt man! But nevermind I got my tann! Even though it's not as much as I wanted! I wore my jersey and it had sleeves so yeah, the top part of my arm is not tann! ARGH! I had to mop and vacuum the floor after they left man! I can go and become some maria already! What a bright future I have! HAHAHHA!

GOODNIGHT!

I love you too!

NATASHA RAEANNE YEO YUL JIE! What in the world did you do to my tagboarddddd! You must be really really high when you did it man! Come and spam my tagboard! You crazy, mad, !(&%*@(#&@ Girl! Anyway what did you do man!?!?!?!?!

Anyway, I got my new LG SHINE KU970 on sunday man! While you have to degrade to a lousier phone! HAHHAAHA! That phone never fails to amaze me! Love it man! Now I only have to put my stuffs inside man, which I didn't had the chance to do so. And yeah, my mom doesn't know that I change phone! HAHAHA! Me and my dad kept it away from her with our good acting skills. Know why? Cos we know that if she finds out she will confirm make alot of noise! HAHAHA! Only thing I woke up later yesterday cos the alarm wasn't really loud enough? I don't know? Have to try it out again today. But luckily my dad sent me to school.

Many things happened yesterday I must say. I had flu for the whole day in school man! So freaking irritating! Don't know how I got it as well! Either I got it in the car or someone in school passed it to me! There's this problem with me, once I sneeze, my nose will start to run and I hate it! Argh! I used like half of my friend's tissue box? And my table was like some toilet bowl? It was like a quarter filled with soiled tissue paper! Talk about germs man! Now the side of my nose is super raw and painful whenever I rub it, due to the amount of tissues I used! Even now I still have a bit of flu but much better than yesterday. But I can't sing for nuts now! BOOO!

We went to Shatec after school for some Western Dining Etiquette. It was super retarded I swear! I had to play role the girl and Moses had to push in the chair for me. Eh! Once in a lifetime experience okay! Hahaha! I was quite unsure to sit down at what speed you know! Like what happen if I fall down and all how!? But Moses did a great job for me la. Now it's my turn to do it for you! Anyway, they served us a 4 course meal and we were all super bloated after that! Smoke Salmon for appetizer, Cream of mushroom for soup, some chicken thing for main and some strawberry cake for dessert. The food was bad but it wasn't very good either. Quite normal? We kept asking for bread la! Like free flow like that! The other tables as well! Super retarded! What's more was that waiter who serve us looked like feaz or however you spell it from "That 70s show!". And I was playing with the brown sugar in my tea after everything. I added alot and it didn't dissolve completely.

Anyway, Physics Practicals are later! Yup, so here I am at home still slacking away. I really don't want to screw it up! I hope I know what to do for the planning of experiment and draw my graph well and take note of the accuracy of the instrument I'm using! Wish me luck man! Speaking of which Prelims are like just 3 weeks away? Or lesser? Have to really study study study. Must make up of the up coming holidays to study!

I shall go for my run later!

BYE NOW!

[Song: Let It Roll-Velvet Revolver]

Oh how I love school on fridays. It's such fun! Yesterday was really funny during P.E. We were all playing touch rugby and we were laughing like mad! There was this moment that William got the ball and started running and 3 of us started to chase him! Then we touched him at the same time, so I guess the force was pretty strong, so he jump, flew and landed rolling on the field! It was damn funny man! Everyone was laughing our heads off! Plus 3 of us were the quite big size kind? HAHAHA!

Then during Physics, Mr Lam accidentally pointed the middle finger at us! Stupid man! He didn't realise at first cos he was "still got one more thing" with his middle finger in the air! When he realised he started to really point it at us! Retarded man! Thn Edgar went to bluff me also after school! He told me that this soccer player transferred to some Iraq soccer club called Baghdad Bombers! Then I went to believe him! OMG man! Then I was thinking where got soccer club call themselves Bombers?!?!?!?! Only later then he told me:"wah! like that you also believe me ah!" Freak man! Well! That's the problem with me! I always believe people damn easily one! So easily until I always get tricked! ARGHHHHH!

Today was quite okay? I managed to study geog after I came home from tuition for 3 hrs before leaving for my wai po jia. So it wasn't as bad as yesterday where I totally slacked man! Oh did I mentioned that I wanted to go for night studies last night when I couldn't find my house key! So I couldn't leave the house! I was searching high and low for it until I pass the time man! So I unpacked my stuffs and found it in between my damn books! Stupid man! Okay so yeah, the others played mahjong so my cousin and I went to Tiong Bahru Plaza to do some grocery shopping for his house. He treated me to coffeebean man!

That's about it man!
Goodnight!

The first thing I wrote with it was your name.

Looking back then, I thinks it's really a stupid thing overall. Yeah, something superbly dumb that I did man! Nevermind, what matters now is that we both forget it and move on. Forget the bad memories and keep the good ones.

I feel damn guilty now. I didn't go for my run as I had planned! Shit! I feel like I'm gaining weight and that I wasted my time. ARGH! Nevermind, I shall go tomorrow! I swear! Only 24 days left to prelims man! I might just go for night study tomorrow, depending. Cos I always feel damn slack on friday nights. So must force myself to study, especially for Chem, Geog, SS and E.maths which are all before the september holidays!

So yesterday chemistry practical was quite okay? Only that I got my calculations wrong, ARGH! and I didn't study on how to prepare the experiment thing. Something really funny happened after that. I went around asking what cation the others got. They said calcium carbonate, thn I got a shocked cos I put Zinc. Then someone went to ask 2 of the chem teachers, they said it's zinc carbonate! HAHAHHAHA! I laughed right in their faces man! Stupid idiots made me super scared la! When they heard, they all got frightened! HAHA! You should have seen their faces man! But then I didn't put carbonate, so wrong as well...shit man! I tested for carbon dioxide TWICE and even saw like 4-5 bubbles but no white precipitate form! Wtf man! Not fair! I want to complain! My chemicals contaminated la!